The Lady Fortunate Journal

Dear Lady

When I started this blog, I did not even think that at some point I would be compelled to write about my experiences. I actually thought it was going to be more based on general issues, with my story hidden in the background—not fully highlighted or revealed. I have always believed myself to be quite a strong lady, the kind of girl who always comforts others in times of need. Well, not to say that I do not break down, but I believed I had mastered the art of not breaking down in front of anyone—only within the confines of my own home or with just a few who really know me (with the exception of worship times). This is how I thought I knew myself. Life taught me to be that way; life taught me to be strong and not to be weak (or so I called it).

It was not until the 7th of March, around 20:15hrs, that I broke down in front of everyone. I could not hold the tears back. They came streaming down, and I did not just cry—I sobbed from deep down in my soul. The weirdest thing of all was that I did not need anyone to hold me, nor was I looking for compassion. I wanted to go out and scream. I did not care who was watching, and I cared even less about what they thought (well, I thought about it afterward though 🤭).

That day, I broke down.

I broke down because I felt like I had failed myself.I broke down because I was so much under pressure at work, and I knew my potential yet it felt like I was failing to tap into it.I broke down because I had written down my goals and plans, but I was struggling to reach them. I desperately needed God to help me. I had had enough of playing ordinary. I needed more. I needed to be more, and I believed I could be more. When I got home, right after 9pm, I wrote a long WhatsApp status. My flatmate chuckled with me the next morning about it, saying it sounded so much like the lady from The Diary of a Mad Black Woman when she had had enough. It gave me perspective on what I was really going through and the changes that were taking place in my life.

These are the few lessons I want to share with you today.

1. Emotions make us human too.

One of the things I have learnt now is that there is absolutely nothing wrong with showing emotion sometimes—it makes us human. No one person can be strong all the time. Sometimes life comes and vexes you a little (or a lot), and you need to respond to it and release that emotion because if you do not, it bottles up inside, and when it finally finds a way out, it explodes. I’m not saying one has to be an emotional wreck; I have realised balance is a great skill. Dear lady, even as a strong, independent, successful woman, emotions make you human too.

2. Breakpoint – Breakthrough point

This lesson I learnt through my mentor—she has been the greatest support system in my life. I often offload my life experiences to her. This lesson I only got to understand a few months later after a rollercoaster of events: a car accident, work pressure, and a number of minor health issues all in the space of a month (you can just imagine). I went to her with all my emotions, crying out, and she reminded me softly, “At the brink of a breakthrough, there is always a final barrier. It’s bigger and stronger than the ones before, but you are made stronger by the small ones. You can handle this. The doors leading to where the safe is are not the strongest—but the safe door is the strongest, and it carries a combination. You can crack this; you’ve come this far.”

After dealing with the emotions, Dear Lady, I need you to realise that the next season you enter into is a season of transition. For you to break through, you might need to bend a little, but that point of almost breaking is your breakthrough point. You need to master it, and you need to deal with all emotional rollercoasters so that you can move forward with clarity.

At some point, I was angry about the accident. I was bumped from the back, and I almost dragged the insurance payout. I was bitter, mainly because the person who bumped me was acting up. Work pressure did not make it easy, and allergy attacks meant I could not run around with my business. So I had to decide to put all my emotions on a harness and deal with them one by one.

Allow me to remind you how wine is made: the grapes have to go through a winepress. A winepress is not a comfortable place—it’s a confined space—but that is where the wine is produced. I am talking about the winepress because there is a man in the Bible called Gideon in Judges 6:11–13. He was in a winepress, but God still referred to him as a mighty man of valor.

Dear lady, you are still great even in any form of winepress that you might be in. You are not defined by your current situation; God's plan and purpose define you. If we could define the gold before it goes through purification, then we wouldn’t be doing much justice, right? It has to go through all the fire and all the hard hammering to become the best sought-after mineral.

Dear lady, you are in the process of being made (we all are, daily), and your greatness lies in not giving up or lying down dead. Let go of the impurities that need to be dropped (but because we are human, unfortunately, it goes through as life experiences). Like my mentor says, “You can crack this; you have come this far.”

3. You are not alone.

I am overjoyed writing all this to you today because I have learnt that as hard, painful, sad, or emotional as any experience are, you are never alone. We serve a living God who is always right there next to us. He promised that He will never leave us nor forsake us (1 Kings 8:57), and besides, the Bible never promised us a smooth-sailing boat. However, it does promise victory and triumph over every situation, and Isaiah 43:2 is clear on that.

Dear Lady, I write this letter to you to encourage you that victory is possible. You might cry; you might gain a few scratches, but keep your head above the water, knowing that victory is guaranteed because you are not in that fire or winepress alone.

I pray this letter gives you hope. I pray this letter helps you gather the energy to fight for your destiny. I pray you win and continue to grow.

With Love,

Lady Fortunate